Depression thought #1

If I were dead would anybody notice? Would anyone care? (Besides my family) I have no friends at all whatsoever and my peers hate me. Sometimes I feel as if I don't exist. But I do. If I had a choice to stop living and to cease existing would I choose it? I would. I would like to be a spirit. A thing that watches but doesn't feel, a thing that knows but doesn't touch, a thing that talks but doesn't care. Well spirits don't talk. So I guess I couldn't be a spirit... I guess I'll be a tree. A dead one of course